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Your Law of Gravity

By:
Severuslovesme (severuslovesme)

For:
elly (elly427)

Fandom:
Battlestar Galactica

Pairing:
Katee/Jamie

Rating:
PG-13

Notes:
The song is Vienna Teng's "Gravity"

Thanks so much to Sailorscully for beta-ing!

Summary:
The irony isn't lost on him. Kara and Lee are dealing, poorly, with their star-crossed, tortured love. That's not a parallel to his real life or anything.

 
Hey love / Is that the name you're meant to have / For me to call

The irony isn't lost on him. Kara and Lee are dealing, poorly, with their star-crossed, tortured love. That isn't a parallel to his real life or anything.

She leaves on the 2nd, and he misses her more than he thought possible. The next month of filming is torture; he comes into work with bags under his eyes, recites his lines by rote and goes home to his empty house. December is cold in Vancouver, and he's spent Decembers here before, but it seems colder this year. Emptier. His house echoes.

They hadn't even been spending that much time off the set together, but its like the house knows that Katee's not in the same city anymore, not propped in her den watching sitcom reruns on late night TV and eating cold pizza straight from the box. Maybe its just that he knows.

Look love / They've given up believing / They've turned aside our stories of the gentle fall

He calls Kerry on Thanksgiving, before dinner at Katee's house. Even though they film in Vancouver, and most of the cast isn't American, she had insisted on celebrating Thanksgiving at the end of November with everyone.

Tahmoh and Aaron bring beer and Grace brings her husband and also pie.

He tells Kerry about that days filming, promises to say hi to everyone from her, hears about Isla's play date with a neighbor, and they're speaking generally about plans for the hiatus when Katee shrieks from the kitchen that the turkey is burning and she needs him.

He tells Kerry goodbye and follows the smell of smoke.

But don't you believe them / Don't you drink their poison too / These are the scars that words have carved / On me

They are standing together, waiting for Eddie and Mary's scene to wrap up so they can all shoot the next CIC scene. In the corner Kandyse and Alessandro are laughing about something with Grace, and Grace catches his eye and waves him over. He shakes his head and smiles.

Where he's standing now he can feel the heat from Katee's body. They stand in silence until Michael yells cut! and move towards the set together, steps locked in time.

He laughs as Mary jokes around, teasing Eddie about the Admiral's crush on the President. He laughs but he watches Katee out of the corner of his eye. She's quiet, which is unlike her, and there are dark circles under her eyes.

Hey love / That's the name we've long held back / From the core of truth

He yells that Lee Adama loves Kara Thrace. He wants to yell that Jamie Bamber loves Katee Sackhoff, even though he knows he can't. He looks at Katee and thinks she knows.

So don't turn away now / I am turning in revolution / These are the scars that silence carved / On me

He has to see his agent in LA before he can fly home to England over the hiatus, but if he's being honest he just wanted to see her.

At dinner they talk about filming and set gossip, innocuous things that coworkers talk about all the time. She comments on how much James is beginning to resemble Jesus, and thinks it's time for someone else to have a meaningful hair-cutting scene. He tells her that Tricia was pretending to protest their love scene last week for that very reason.

He tells her about the trick Aaron and Tahmoh played on Kandyse, how they filled her trailer with flowers and candy and love poems, all signed Alessandro. She laughs at that, throws her head back and he's captivated by the line of her neck as it meets her shoulder.

They walk back to her house and the city glows around them.

This the same place / No, not the same place / This is the same place, love / No, not the same place we've been before

They are old pros at this now, and the crew remembers the pranks and jokes and general hilarity of the Season 1 version, so the set is packed the day they film the New Caprica love scene.

He slides his hand along her side and hears her quiet gasp. Around them the crew fixes the lighting, adjusts the cameras, yells encouragement and direction.

When Katee slides on top of him he has to look away, has to get out of his own head and back into Lee's, because right now he's looking at Katee and not Kara.

Jamie never thought that he would look back on their Season 1 love scene with fondness.
Then he was still deep in denial, still playing with his girls during the act breaks and helping Kerry feed them at lunch. Today he ate lunch with Katee, and they talked about the scene they just filmed, and what small animal Meatball chased that morning, and whether they would be nominated for any Golden Globes this year. Then they walked back onto the set and he pretended that he wasn't in love with her.

But Lee is in love with Kara, which makes things slightly more difficult. While filming Season 1 Katee put smiley faces on her breasts and they laughed their way through the scene. Now they lay together on the grass and Jamie tries not to shiver when a strand of her hair brushes his arm.

He catches Tricia looking at him the next day, with no expression on her face. He meets her eyes and she turns away.

Hey, love / I am a constant satellite / Of your blazing sun

She reaches a hand up, carelessly, to tousle her drying hair, and suddenly he can't breathe. He watches the sun glint off of her hair, growing out a little after Kara's personal-growth moment with the scissors, and wonders how everyone else manages to not love her. They do love her, he knows, they think she's funny and fun and charming, but she doesn't shimmer in their eyes, she isn't all they can see.

He is orbiting her, has been maybe since he met her, and he wishes he knew when he got dragged into her gravitational pull. Or maybe he wandered into it all on his own.

He leans out of his chair and pokes her in the side, just to touch her, just to see her jump and yelp a little. The woman putting on Katee's makeup scowls at him and he retreats. But Katee smiles and suddenly the world is a little sunnier.

My love / I obey your law of gravity

He calls her on Christmas Day, out on the balcony like he's doing something wrong, which maybe he is. He should be inside, helping Kerry cook dinner, helping Isla set up her new dollhouse and listening to Darcy sing Christmas carols.

But he needs to hear her voice, so that he can picture her in his head, just a little, enjoying Christmas with her family. He imagines her watching White Christmas and drinking eggnog and wishes he were there.

The phone rings, once, twice, keeps ringing. Her voicemail picks up and tells him to leave a message.

This is the fate you've carved on me / The law of gravity

He used to look forward to hiatus, not just because he got to see his family, but because he thought the break would cure him of Katee. Somehow the time apart would erase all of the things that made him love her, maybe after a break he would dream of his wife and not of his co-star.

It's been three years, and he knows better now.

This is the fate you've carved on me

 Comments

 Left By:
anr (anr)

At:
2006-12-25 19:09:45

 
Oh, *lovely*. I like fics from Jamie's pov, and stories that touch on *Unfinished Business*, and this hit all the right notes. Excellent.


 Left By:
Voleuse (Voleuse)

At:
2006-12-26 00:57:44

 
Oh, this is so pretty! A great exploration of tension, and I love all the tiny details about set interactions. And, "She comments on how much James is beginning to resemble Jesus," made me laugh for five minutes straight. Hee!


 Left By:
Maren (marenfic)

At:
2006-12-26 10:31:04

 
This is lovely-- I like seeing a Jamie POV with him having the unrequited love. You manage to walk the fine line with him, of having him pining after Katee, married, and still a totally good guy.Great.


 Left By:
elly (elly427)

At:
2006-12-28 23:31:31

 
Oh, poor, poor Jamie! You managed to hit on one of my favorite things about Katie even without me asking for it!Loved this line: "Where he's standing now he can feel the heat from Katee's body." Lovely.Also! I love the Vienna Tang song you worked in.Thank you, secret santa!


 Left By:
alanna (wisteria)

At:
2006-12-29 14:01:55

 
Wow. This really got under my skin, especially for the hint of darkness and how Jamie's seething just under his skin. Plus, I *love* Jamie POV, which is all too rare in Katie-fic, so of course I had a soft spot for this one. :) Thanks for sharing!