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it can feel so real

skripka (skripka)

Katarin (katarin)


Adrian Pasdar/Milo Ventimiglia


Thanks to Jeff Buckley and Martha Wainwright for writing music that makes it possible to write.

Not everything ends in tears.

"I can't do this."

Adrian looks up from where he's filling out the daily crossword puzzle. Milo's sprawled on the easy chair, as sartorially perfect as always--jeans and vintage tee shirt for a lazy at-home day--and frowning. There's an industry rag on his thigh, but Milo's not been reading it, unless he's been sneaking glances between the glances Adrian's been tossing his way.


Milo grimaces and waves his hand vaguely in the air. "This. This... whatever it is."

"Cozy domesticity?" Adrian's not sure what the problem is--he's exceedingly comfortable today. It's a bit warm outside, and he misses Nat and the boys with a bone-deep ache, but having Milo here makes it bearable.

Milo sighs, drops the rag, and paces, running his fingers through his newly-shorn hair. The sunroom isn't terribly big, but at least the toys are put away for a change.

Adrian watches. It's not so much entertaining as distressing and vaguely frustrating. Milo's wound too tight; Natalie bitches at him when she has to use her elbows on Milo's back, just to get him past the point of obsession with the day. Adrian agrees and worries. They joke that Adrian's kind of a mother-hen about everybody, but it's what he does best for the people he loves. And he loves Milo almost as much as he loves Natalie.

"Mi." Adrian puts a bit of push on the syllable, and it makes Milo pause, long enough for Adrian to get a word in. "What's wrong?"

"This! The whole ... cozy thing." Milo's arms fly up. "I don't know what I should be more freaked out about--falling for my married costar or falling for his wife."

That pushes Adrian to the edge of laughter. He refrains, though, because he recognizes Milo's mood. If he doesn't at least seem to take the ranting seriously, Milo will stalk off, probably out of the house, and it'll be weeks before Adrian will be able to break down the barriers Milo will put up.

It's a bit scary that he knows this already.

"It is a bit surreal, huh?" Not so much placating as the honest truth. The attraction Adrian felt for Milo was nearly as visceral as the one he had for Nat, and her blessing and understanding allowed their relationship to go to the next step. Adrian knew that Nat and Mi would get along; the surprise was how well they did.

Now it was Natalie finding articles about "triads" and "open and closed vees" and all sorts of relationship advice online, and Adrian and Milo going along and nodding.

Of course, none of that is helping now, not when Milo's having a freak out.

"I guess. No. Maybe." Milo shrugs, still frustrated.

Adrian leans back in his chair, letting the newspaper drop. "You do know we don't have to psychoanalyze every little piece of this relationship, right?"

Milo practices his eye roll. "There's just so many ways this can blow up in our faces, you know."

"There are also a few that don't end in tears." Adrian feels the need to point that out.

"Are we that lucky?"

"We've been so far.

Milo shakes his head in disbelief, a frustrated grunt escaping from his mouth. Adrian can't stand not touching him any more, so he stands and crosses to Milo. He puts his hands on Milo's shoulder, tilting his head to look Milo in the eyes. "You gotta trust something sometime, Mi."

"Yeah, but what if I'm wrong?"

Adrian shrugs and pulls Milo close. "Well, then you'll be human, like the rest of us."

Milo puts his face on Adrian's shoulder. "Shoulda been a fucking counselor, man." Adrian can feel some of Milo's tension loosening, and that allows Adrian's laugh to escape, finally.

"Screw that. Wouldn't be able to do this if I was." Adrian twists and pulls Milo's face up so they can kiss, and that makes Adrian's day even better.


 Left By:
Katarin (katarin)

2007-12-25 14:21:46

Oh I love how Milo's the one freaking out and Adrian takes care of him. After finding out about Adrian making Milo soup I've been in the mood for Adrian takes care of Milo fic. Thank you so much. I also love that you managed to get a nod in to Adrian/Milo/Natalie because I kind of LOVE the three of them together. In short, you are AWESOME!

 Left By:
Guest (kellygirl)

2007-12-25 23:45:53

This was great. Loved Adrian's thoughts on Milo as he watched Milo pace and be frustrated.

 Left By:
llaras (llaras)

2007-12-28 04:09:38

Very nice and it made me happy. I'd like to think the three of them could make it work.